The Path of Darkness and the Path of Light are spiritual paths that seniors walk as we seek to find meaning in our lives.  We may be tempted to think that an easy life leads to happiness and peace.  Many years ago, I discovered that this is not necessarily so.

I was teaching Social Work at the Uni of NSW and was asked to assist in marking some assignments for a course in Human Development.  For this particular assignment the students (90 of them) had to interview an older person (70+ years) about their life history, then apply a theory of ageing to their findings.  Most chose Erikson’s eight stages of life.  The assignments made fascinating reading.  This happened back in the 1980’s and there were many refugees from the Baltic states living in Sydney, who had fled oppressive regimes years before. They had suffered terribly and had seen and endured unspeakable acts of violence.  Now they were old and being asked to review their lives. I expected to read about many stories of despair – of old people walking the path of darkness.  Instead, these were stories of hope and peace.  People were grateful to live peaceful lives and seem to have found a way to live with the trauma they had experienced.  Some of those interviewed had been born in Australia. They had led relatively uneventful lives but were now in despair about their life’s choices.  I was astonished. It taught me that the actual happenings in our lives do not necessarily dictate the spiritual paths that we tread.

In my work as an aged care chaplain working in a residential setting, I also encountered stories of both despair and hope that had little to do with the sadness or happiness of the life that had been lived.  One story of despair has stayed with me.  The 90-year-old woman, whom I shall call Ethel, was delightful but also very angry and despairing.  In my humble opinion, she had lived a charmed life ­ lovely husband, kind caring daughter and, in the past, a beautiful singing voice.  But she told me she was angry with God because he took her husband in his 60’s and left her alone, she was only able to have one child, and her voice was gone because of her age.  Everything else, it seems, had been fine.

Thus, walking the Path of Darkness is not an inevitable consequence of a traumatic or disappointing life.

What then can we do to get onto the Path of Light and not be trapped on a Path of Darkness?

Click here for Part 3: Finding Gratitude in the Darkness.